


hxh poems

by hisokazer



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Multi, Poetry, Spoilers, badly written poetry made at 3 am so theres nothing new here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-22 11:27:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30037983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hisokazer/pseuds/hisokazer
Summary: hunter x hunter character study poems.
Relationships: Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck, Hisoka/Kuroro Lucifer | Chrollo Lucifer, Kurapika/Leorio Paladiknight
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	1. A requiem for a hauntingly beautiful nightmare that is you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chrollo talks about hisoka.  
> 

**A requiem for a hauntingly beautiful nightmare that is you, Chrollo’s poem to Hisoka.**

You have killed me, you have betrayed me, you have abandoned me.

You have destroyed every fragmented piece that holds my soul together;  
_you have killed me._  
You have taken back the foolish promises of trust from your idiotic mouth;  
_you have betrayed me._  
You have slithered away from my once divine Eden and left a trail of your sin;  
_you have abandoned me._

Like a snake in my paradise,  
you have held a sickeningly sweet apple to my lips; temptation.  
You sink your fangs in the sinful flesh of my form,  
letting your venom run its course through my body.  
Of course, the bitter poison of your betrayal remains fresh on my eager tongue.

You are but a magician dancing in the threads of fate suspended by my weary hands.  
Hands that once explored the vast oceans of your body,  
hands that once held you among the divine celestial beings of the galaxy,  
hands that have loved you time and time again,  
and hands that now hold the silver paintbrush drawing a flurry of scarlet ribbons slipping from the gaping hole in your chest.

_I have killed you, you have betrayed me, you have abandoned me._


	2. What is no longer mine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leorio deals with kurapika's absence.

**What is no longer mine, Leorio’s poem to Kurapika.**

Your voice reminds me of a song I heard when I was young,  
when the days were sweet and fleeting,  
when I could look up and see not a dark sky, but the moon and her blossoming garden of stars.  
I cradle the silken melody in my arms, afraid that it might disappear if I stop listening.  
Your voice reminds me of longing.

Longing for a time when your presence felt like the morning sun,  
a burning flare in the vacant cavity of my hollow heart.  
Longing for a time when your voice would fill the room with a sound so elegant and beguiling,  
I refuse to believe it is of a man’s, and not Apollo’s lyre.

I find myself fighting for the last ounces of your love.  
I surrender my flesh and bones for you, ripping my skin apart with the pretense of getting something in return.  
I do not get anything in return.  
I am instead greeted with the monotonous beeping of an unanswered call,  
a reminder that you are no longer mine to love.


	3. What the stars told me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> killua remembers what it means to love and be loved.

**What the stars told me, Killua’s poem to Gon.**

I adore you, I adore you, I adore you.  
 _(Do you feel the same way?)_

With sunkissed eyes tinted like the sweet nectar of the Gods _(am I good enough for the Gods?)_ ,  
I adore you.  
With a laugh enough to cause beautiful seismic shifts in my world _(can I laugh along too?)_ ,  
I adore you.  
With the capacity to love even the most disgusting of sinners _(sinners like me?)_ ,  
I adore you.

I adore you, I adore you, I adore you.  
 _(Please tell me you feel the same way.)_

I worry that I am looking at your love as if it is more than an illusion played by my dying mind,  
 _(I was never worthy of it anyway.)_  
that my rotten hands were made to destroy everything it holds in its selfish little grasp,  
 _(I’m afraid that I will ruin you like I have many others.)_  
that your beautiful smile will crumble in my revolting fingers,  
 _(My cursed bloodline knows this too._ )  
that I will die filled to the brim with a sea of regrets; that I will die alone.  
 _(Without you, my beloved, by my side.)_

And I cannot begin to fathom why I loathe the prick of a needle breaking skin,  
 _(Because it steals every bit of the love I have left for you.)_  
or why the crack of a whip rings through my fractured hollow bones,  
 _(Because it reminds me that I am a monster, I am a monster.)_  
yet your sweet, honeyed voice ignites a warm flame in my forsaken existence.  
 _(Because I am reminded of how beautiful it is to be loved.)_

I adore you, I adore you, I adore you.  
 _(The stars tell me that you feel the same way, and I am happy.)_


	4. You were a dream I once had

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gyro realizes that his father never loved him.
> 
> (just to be clear, i do NOT ship them. this talks about gyro's trauma and abuse, and how torn he felt when he saw his dad leave him to basically die in the streets. i repeat, this is NOT a ship post.)

**You were a dream I once had, Gyro's poem to his abusive father.**

You are like a dream I once had.

A dream that began with fairies and flowers,

and ended with monsters and ogres and life bleeding through a gaping hole in my chest.

You are like a dream I once had.

Ever so graceful,

ever so elegant,

the most horrifying fantastical creatures lurking behind a cloudy wall of white mist.

You are like a dream I once had.

Waiting for me to uncover its wondrous secrets,

keeping it neatly hidden behind a beautiful foggy sheet of glass,

only to reveal that it’s a terrifyingly perverse imitation of life beyond the confines of my mind.

But you are not a dream,

you are a nightmare disguised as one.

You steal my breath from my lungs and place them in your own,

you took life away from me after convincing me that it was a gift,

you killed me with the same hands you held me with,

and you told me that you were a dream, a beautiful dream, but _you lied._


	5. Kil, come home.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> killua watches gon, and he has trouble keeping his intrusive thoughts at bay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the text that is both bold and italic are killua's intrusive thoughts but from the perspective of his older brother illumi.  
> the text that is only in italics represent killua's intrusive thoughts, from the perspective of himself haha.
> 
> tbh i don't rlly like this poem bc it's rushed and only a warm-up, but eh.

**Kil, come home. Killua’s poem to Gon, and his intrusive thoughts in Illumi’s point of view.**

I never stopped looking into your eyes when you yelled at me that day,  
when the sweet pools of honey stirred with something more than love; something like anger.  
I watched you sink your fangs into the guard with the devil’s tail,  
and watched the beautiful spark of life you once had turn into an explosion of rage.  
 _(I fell through the cracks of your voice, and I wish I could fall into your arms instead.)_

_**(Are you so upset because your life revolves around his golden seal of approval? Oh, I know, is it because you can’t bear the burden of knowing that your greatest fears were realized the day your stupid mouth slipped and you disappointed him? Kil, come home and I’ll never be angry at you.)** _

-

I couldn’t do anything but watch as gray tears stained your sun-kissed cheeks,  
and when you clenched your fists like you were trying to crush that awful gnawing feeling of anguish  
that couldn’t seem to leave you alone in spite of however many lives you stole in Kite’s name.  
 _(My hands are permanently stained scarlet, can you tell that I’ve killed in your name too?)_

_**(You’re so disgusting. Gon would never accept someone as low as monsters like you, his blood will always be too pure for yours. Kil, come home and I’ll always accept you.)** _

-

And I watched your chest rise and fall in the hospital,  
listening to the shrill monotone beeps of the heart monitor flood my ears,  
watching the neon green line leap over imaginary hurdles and fall back down.  
It reminds me of when we were running in that field; of when we were happy.  
 _(Please don’t leave me, please don’t leave me, please don’t leave me.)_

_**(Is it because you have no one else to turn to? Or are you incapable of taking another breath without him by your side? Kil, come home and I’ll always be with you.)** _

_**Kil, you’ve always been such a stubborn assassin.** _

_**Just come home, come home, come home.** _


	6. I reap that fruits of hatred you sow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chrollo thinks about what he'd like to do with hisoka (succession war arc).

**I reap the fruits of hatred you sow, Chrollo’s poem to Hisoka.**

Pulling back and leaving your velveteen lips will always be my favorite part of a kiss.  
Because even when flesh is on flesh,  
I can still feel your fingernails raking into mine,  
stealing my blood and twisting my vessels to feed yours,  
carving another sin in my tally and reminding me that I am but a marred angel cast down from His kingdom.

And I so desperately want to do the same to you,  
because I want you to feel how it is to have been killed but not quite dead,  
to know that the tremor of a beating pulse is worse than breathing another puff of air reeking of your cologne’s revolting stench,  
to know that a thief masquerading as a savior stole your life and left you with a crude gift; a necrotic ache festering in the maggot-ridden cavities of your chest.

And I hate you, I hate you, I hate you.

I will never be satisfied until I am sure that you feel the same,  
when you can almost see the calling of life get dimmer in tandem with your decomposing soul,  
when you can almost hear the crackle of a flame burn the impure flesh of a sinner,  
because it’s what you deserve, it’s what you deserve, it’s what you deserve.

Your head will be the main course of my feast,  
and I will reap the fruits of hatred you sowed the day I met your velveteen lips.


End file.
